看这里看这里。
章臻瑶 (描述现状)Since the earth is in great danger now, all of us should lead a low-carbon living. （给出观点，点题）One thing we can do is to be a green consumer, which means to change our spending habits. （理由1）First of all, we shouldn’t buy throw-away things which produce CFCs and damage the ozone layer. （理由2）We should send short messages instead of buying cards as well. （理由3）What’s more, we shouldn’t buy tissues but handkerchiefs instead so as to reduce the amount of rubbish. (总结,再次点题)As we all know, we have only one earth. So let’s take action to be green consumers to take care of it.
优点：开头结尾点题并呼应。论述清晰，有关联词。
黄含 Nowadays, protecting the environment has become a more and more popular topic throughout the world. As for me, the most urgent thing is to be a green consumer in order to fight against pollution. In the first place, we can reduce CO2 buy not buying unnecessary things. In addition, purchasing fewer plastic items to protect the ozone layer is also a good idea. Furthermore, we should send short messages instead of buying cards at Christmas so that the rain forests are protected. As an old saying goes, nothing is impossible to a willing heart. I firmly believe that if every one of us tries to be a green consumer, the environment will be much better.
优点：引用谚语，句式丰富(…so that the rain forests are protected)。
肖雯倩 As is known to all, the earth is in great danger because of pollution. In my case,(=I think) it’s necessary to be a green consumer. To begin with, I shouldn’t buy unnecessary things in order to reduce CO2. What’s more, I oughtn’t to buy spray cans as well as plastic items, which produce CFCs, so as to protect the ozone layer. Moreover, I shouldn’t buy disposable chopsticks. For one thing, that saves trees. For another, that prevents erosion as well. Last but not least, it’s obvious that I shouldn’t buy things only for fashion and the amount of rubbish will be reduced.
优点：关联词独特 缺点：没有引用，结尾没有点题。
章臻瑶 (描述现状)Since the earth is in great danger now, all of us should lead a low-carbon living. （给出观点，点题）One thing we can do is to be a green consumer, which means to change our spending habits. （理由1）First of all, we shouldn’t buy throw-away things which produce CFCs and damage the ozone layer. （理由2）We should send short messages instead of buying cards as well. （理由3）What’s more, we shouldn’t buy tissues but handkerchiefs instead so as to reduce the amount of rubbish. (总结,再次点题)As we all know, we have only one earth. So let’s take action to be green consumers to take care of it.
优点：开头结尾点题并呼应。论述清晰，有关联词。
黄含 Nowadays, protecting the environment has become a more and more popular topic throughout the world. As for me, the most urgent thing is to be a green consumer in order to fight against pollution. In the first place, we can reduce CO2 buy not buying unnecessary things. In addition, purchasing fewer plastic items to protect the ozone layer is also a good idea. Furthermore, we should send short messages instead of buying cards at Christmas so that the rain forests are protected. As an old saying goes, nothing is impossible to a willing heart. I firmly believe that if every one of us tries to be a green consumer, the environment will be much better.
优点：引用谚语，句式丰富(…so that the rain forests are protected)。
肖雯倩 As is known to all, the earth is in great danger because of pollution. In my case,(=I think) it’s necessary to be a green consumer. To begin with, I shouldn’t buy unnecessary things in order to reduce CO2. What’s more, I oughtn’t to buy spray cans as well as plastic items, which produce CFCs, so as to protect the ozone layer. Moreover, I shouldn’t buy disposable chopsticks. For one thing, that saves trees. For another, that prevents erosion as well. Last but not least, it’s obvious that I shouldn’t buy things only for fashion and the amount of rubbish will be reduced.
优点：关联词独特 缺点：没有引用，结尾没有点题。
