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求写作大神看看作文能几分~~~

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  • brp768
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如果你打分准,我请你吃北京烤鸭!一句话的回复什么6、5分的那种就不要了,请以理服人,请真正的大神进!
topic: Some people think developing countries should invite large foreign companies to open offices and factories to grow their economies. Others think developing countries should keep large companies out and develop local companies instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
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How to develop the economy is a difficult problem that developing countries have to confront. Some people think developing countries should invite large foreign companies to open offices and factories to develop their economies. They claim that large foreign companies could bring both advanced technologies and enough capitals, which are necessary factors to grow economies. However, others hold the opinion that developing countries should keep large foreign countries out and develop local companies. It is quite understandable that people from different backgrounds have different points on the same issue.
Those who favor keeping large foreign companies out give their reasons as follows. First of all, local companies do not have any advantages on technology, capital and cost so that local companies cannot compete with these large foreign companies. If foreign companies are invited, many local companies will fail and then the country’s economy will be controlled by foreign companies. Furthermore, the sole purpose of foreign companies is to make profit from developing countries. The profit-driven business neglects the environment pollution people’s health. Although they will help on the economy development, foreign companies should be keep out from developing countries.
But the people who agree with to invite foreign companies also have sound reasons. In the first place, large foreign companies are international enterprises with both advanced technologies and sufficient capitals. Inviting them could resolve the capital shortage and backward technology of developing countries. Then their economy will grow with a rapid speed. In addition, these foreign companies have to hire local people as employees. Along with more and more people work for these foreign companies, that means more and more local person have chance to study advanced technologies and management experiences. If they select to work for local companies, the technology will no longer be a problem to developing countries. It is also a significant benefit from inviting foreign companies.
There is probably a little bit of truth in both arguments. For my part, I completely agree with the latter point of view that developing countries should invite large foreign countries. The obvious benefits are that the problem of technology and capital could be solved and local people have chance to study more advanced technologies and management experiences. Although inviting foreign companies also has its negative effects, developing countries could take some actions to eliminate them so that is not a big problem.


  • 伊人深闺梦江南
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模板痕迹略重啊 第一段废话不能再多...


2026-05-19 18:18:54
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  • 长篇火锅
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1.字数:不宜过多,‘In addition, these foreign’这里就已经到达了字数要求,在此之外的陈述,字数方面不会有分数上的影响,但内容连贯性和稳定性就受到了影响。一部分考官甚至不把规定字数之外的正常内容计算在评分范围(但你有错就扣分)。
2.词汇:一部分七分词汇和很多六分词汇短语,有重复现象但也在一定程度兼顾了词汇的替换。
3.内容:回答问题,引起讨论,提出观点方面都还不错。内在衔接和内容的完整性上有待提高,比方说1st of all 和furthermore的搭配,but作为段落开头的错误用法,还有‘If foreign companies are invited, many local companies will fail and then the country’s economy will be controlled by foreign companies’这句话我真的不懂是哪个内容引出来的,和之前那句话的关系不够明显,哦,之前那句话也不能当做一个原因出现。第二个主体段也有类似的地方你再看看。
4.一些细节:slang不能用在学术写作,比如a little bit和not a big problem那里。还有单复数的运用这都得自己看。
单词拼写什么的由于是typing就不给你看了,考场上自己注意。
作文6.5,考虑考场因素6分。
献丑。


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5.5吧 模板痕迹太重了 逻辑也不是很有说服力 语法和词汇挺好的 推荐你买一本慎小疑的写作十天突破 个人见解非大神


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开头太长了


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