Let’s face it. We all fail. 人人都有失败，不如坦然面对。
As we go through life we have
relationships that don’t work out, jobs that just aren’t right, exams that we
flunk, initiatives that don’t succeed. The more new things we try the more
failures we are likely to have. In fact, the only way to avoid failure is to do
nothing new.
这一生，我们总会遇到纠缠不清的人际关系、不甚满意的工作、未通过的考试，或者不曾实现的计划。尝试越多，挫折也越多。除非什么都不干，否则难免遭受打击。
The
important thing is how we deal with failure. It can be part of a downward slide
in which lack of confidence reinforces feelings of inadequacy and incompetence.
But experiencing failure can be a learning experience and an opportunity for a
fresh start. A good way to begin this process is by asking yourself some tough
questions. 关键是我们如何面对失败。人走下坡路，往往会自卑，感到无能为力。但失败也是吸取教训、重新开始的机会。要重新开始，最好认真思考下面几个问题。
1. What can I learn from this? 我从失败中学到了什么？
Take responsibility for what
went wrong. OK, so it was not all your fault – but some of it was. Successful
people don’t make excuses or blame others. They take ownership of the issues. Be
critical but constructive. Try to look at the experience objectively. Make a
list of the key things that happenedanalyze the list step-by-step and look for the learning
points.
为所犯的错承担责任。的确，失败并非完全你的错，但你也确实在责难逃吧。成功的人从来不为失败找借口或抱怨他人，而是坦然承担责任。所以，试着客观看待挫折，列出清单，一步一步认真总结才好。
2. What could I have done differently? 如果重来一次会不会有不同的处理方式？
What other
options did you have? What choices did you make? How could you have handled it
differently? With thebenefit of hindsight, what different steps would you have
taken? 当初是否还有其他途径？可否换一种方式处理？后见之明或许能让你发现原来还有别的方法解决问题。
3. Do I need to acquire
or improve some skills? 我的能力是否亟待提高？
Did the problem reveal some lack of skill
on your part? How could you learn or improve those skills? Perhaps there are
books or courses or people you could turn to. Make a self-development plan to
acquire the skills and experiences you need.
挫折是否也代表你能力不足呢？该怎样弥补？或许，你可以读书、上课或向人请教。制定计划，努力提高自己的能力吧。
4. Who can I learn from? 我能向谁学习？
Is there someone to whom you can turn
to for advice? Did a boss, colleague or a friend see what happened? If they are
constructive and supportive then ask them for some feedback and guidance. Most
